It has recently come to my attention that, of all the movies I’ve seen in my lifetime, only nine are on AFI’s “100 Greatest Movies” list. In an effort to rectify that, I am making my way through the list one film at a time. As always, these reviews are purely subjective, and I reserve the right to retroactively change my rating whenever I want. (I don’t know why I’m telling you that.)

This week’s selection: The Bridge on the River Kwai.

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I was at a bar in Scranton, PA a few weeks ago with a friend of mine (he’s also my screenwriting partner in the rare moments when we’re both able to shake off our collective sloth and, you know, actually write something). On the TV behind the bar, Back to the Future was playing, and I mentioned that I’d never actually seen it before. I didn’t think there was anything particularly remarkable about that, but apparently it’s borderline treasonous not to have seen the comedic stylings of the impish Michael J. Fox and the (possibly pedophilic) madcap charm of Christopher Lloyd, because my friend was appalled.

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